Oh, this blog is still here

Purgatory ⋆ Amos' Southend : Amos' Southend

It’s been a while since I posted anything on here and I just saw the annual charge on my credit card so HollyLyme is going to live another year.  Why not ramble about how things have been since I have been off antibiotics and antifungals for over a year now?

I don’t have a whole lot to report or maybe I just don’t know how. I think I am “better”.  I am not coughing up thick mucus and I don’t have scabs all over my face and body anymore.  I sleep more than six hours a night.  I am working and enjoying it.  I’m okay.

I feel like Lyme disease, at least for me, is very ambiguous right now.   There seem to be several schools of thought amongst both doctors and the general public. I would just go with science but that doesn’t seem like a black and white choice currently.

I continue to read and hear about emerging connections, new testing, personal struggles, failures and triumphs of all things Lyme.  I don’t feel like I have a clear triumph and or failure personally.  I feel like I am somewhere between healthy and forever in fear.  That’s all I got.

Thanks Kathleen

Ever since I have been a girl I have had this voice in my head fighting the things that I hear and see as I move through the world. When I was yelled at by men on the street I always wanted to yell back in a much nastier and obviously demeaning way! I wanted to laugh and point right back at the boys for the same things they were laughing and pointing at me for. I wanted to be the quarterback, but I didn’t want to be the quarterback. If you don’t get that last line it’s okay.

My first memories of my teen idol started in my summer school gym class. There was another redhead, gym failure who decided it was important to ask me if I knew about Bikini Kill. I didn’t know about them. She was right, it was important. Thank You Jessica!.


What Bikini Kill was and will always be is a revolution. My heart still flips when I hear “Rebel Girl”. The freedom, the joy and the shared secrets that Bikini Kill opened to my girl mind and my girl heart will live with me for the rest of life. I learned that my power was mine and that’s okay. I yelled back! I suffered for this sometimes but it was worth it!

A few months back I was experiencing a large range of serious symptoms, I was calling off of work because I was having trouble not bleeding randomly while pipetting very expensive antibodies. I was suffering from an illness that had been misidentified as a terrible case of MRSA! On one of my insomnia nights I decided to watch the documentary “The Punk Singer”.

This documentary goes over a brief history of a beautiful butterfly who gets shot down by a chronic bacterial illness and then shows the world her wounds. The brilliant Bikini Kill front woman, Kathleen Hanna, her need to be this person who decided what was happening. Her fear of facing this sickness and the shitstorm it will bring. The vulnerability that had to come with her healing. This warrior was having a hard time. Thank God!! Me too! Damn it do I have chronic Lyme disease?

Months, doctors visits, false negative$ and finally a pcr lyme (whole blood) showed the lyme was in my plasma. I started a blog.

The bottom line is this blog entry is a big thank you to Kathleen Hanna for having the gusto to be Kathleen Hanna. You may have saved my life warrior lady!

Look at me, help me.


There has been some kind of bacteria war zone on my nose, chin and around my ears since this Lyme thing blew up in my face, literally.  My neck is occasionally breaking out in rashes that end in a bunch of gold hairs shedding from my skin. I’m not crazy, I’m inclined to believe people when they call me that but my shrink hasn’t let on so I’m gonna call them assholes.  They are assholes. Every last one of them!


For about two weeks I couldn’t look out a window.  I was pretty sure I was going to at least lose an eyeball because the pain was worse than pushing a child out of my vagina.  So I figured get the eyeballs out because this shit hurts soooo much. I got to keep both my eyes and now I do not need my current prescription of glasses.  Thankfully, I have had the same eye doctor since I was very young because I was born with a cross eye. Thankfully.


I thought the Masons were after me for a couple weeks.  God was speaking to me for two months and if you know me, you know I’m pretty much an Atheist.  He spoke to me through Wayne’s World mostly. I drove to Milwaukee. PS. God’s a pervert.


-Kathleen Hannah of Bikini Kill, Le Tigre, Julie Ruin..

The test doesn’t work.  The test doesn’t work. The test doesn’t work.  Lord help me people! The test doesn’t work!!!! If you have the common co infections that chronic lyme patients have you aren’t going to be producing IGG or IGM antibodies for the Elisa qualifying Western blot that is approved by your insurance (assuming you have it!)  Go to Igenex’s website if you want a test that can help chronic lyme patients. “Watch Under Our Skin!” or “The Punk Singer” https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1785612/ Fucking do it!! Please.



My blood under my microscope…

Look at me!!!  Help me!!!!!!!!!  Learn. I promise you this will end up touching your life like cancer. With or without your help or attention!!!!!

Springtime Lyme

Lately, Chronic Lyme Disease is everywhere.  That’s because it’s spring and a few celebrities have come down with it.  This happens every spring actually and as global warming gets worse more people will come down with this illness and more and more celebrities will become “the new face of Lyme”  the mysterious new illness that some quacks say isn’t new at all.


Chronic Lyme is a case where dormant bacteria basically wakes up.  It wakes up in the warmer weather and rain plays a part as well. As time goes by this will all become apparent and the CDC will be “working hard” on that vaccine.  They know it won’t kill most of us, at least not their key market anyway.

Learn more about Chronic Lyme disease and spirochete dormancy.  It’s also important to know that this disease and these bacteria have no issue passing the BBB and entering your ear, nose, throat, and CNS. A great movie is “Under Our Skin”.


If you are already immuno compromised this could make your treatment more painful and for a longer duration.  If you really love the cold way too much, get tested. Chronic sinus infections? Sore throat? Ear infections? Impetigo?  If these things are way worse in the spring I suggest you consider a Chronic Lyme test. Take note that there are effective treatments for Chronic Lyme disease.